Therapist Sarah said that if I were part of a holiday grief group she would give me the assignment to write up for next year what I learned from this year about what healing at this time of year means to me.
She also did this really cool therapist thing in which she redefined [or encouraged me to redefine] my isolating as contemplating.
Whatever -- words define us so next year I'll be contemplating.
Probably from Thanksgiving until ... hmmm ... New Year's Day? Epiphany? We'll see how the next two weeks go, whether or not the rage really subsides, as I think it will.
What might work for me next year based on what I learned this year.
Pull away from people starting the week of Thanksgiving.
Consume each of my foundational Christmas stories at
least once. (The Baby story, the Old Man story, and the American mercantile story).
See only those people who I know like me and them only in small amounts.
Take myself to entertainment opportunities.
Give myself permission to change my mind (especially about entertainment opportunities).
When the absence grows too large, lie down on the grave and weep.
Do church work. Welcome the Baby.
Have no expectations of others or myself.
She also wanted me to think each day about what small hope was achievable each day. I'll hold on to that one.
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